7 January 2014

Love Yourself More By Doing This: Quit Judging Others (PLUS: Freebies!)

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judging others

This video is response to the butt load of questions I've received in my inbox over the last few months.

Basically, I want to crack open a conversation about tumultuous relationships in our lives. About cause and effect. And, let's be honest, about how to pull yourself out of that funky, mind-created space of: I've outgrown my friends.

In the video, I share personal examples of my own Holier Than Thou behaviour, and struggles that Glen and I have navigated through in the face of judgment and shaming.

And, because I know you're a busy little bee, I've included an audio download for your convenience. Yep. You can now listen to my voice on your way to work. Huzzah! Right click to download the audio.

To pull back on judging others, click play.

There's a few points I want to add here:

1. This message isn't just about learning how to 'cope' with negative people in your life, it's about reframing your perception of negativity.

2. It's also about learning to love and truly value the adventure YOU'RE on, because when YOU believe in the power of possibility, and when you show up to the conversation beaming your truth, you truly, touch the cells of those around you. You leave a gentle imprint.

3. Never justify your decisions and choices. Ever. Whether you've taken up yoga, or decided to attend weekly Buddhist meditations, or sworn off sugar, if you're being pressed to reason your WHY - your motivation - a simple: 'It just feels like the right thing for me to right now' will suffice.  (With confidence, and a smile, of course)

4. I mean it when I say this: When you pull back from judging yourself (a daily practice, I assure you), you'll naturally cast less judgement out onto the world. And the pay off that comes with that? You'll no longer feel that looming pang of negativity sizzling into your skin. Either that, or when you do, you'll have stopped caring about it.

At the end of the say, it's all about GROWTH, sweet potato.

You have nothing to feel ashamed of, nothing to regret. Everything to celebrate.

You're simply to watch in a little closer as you go about interacting with the peeps in your life. If you want to dive a little deeper into this, I've written about projecting our judgements, and what it means to reveal our shadow selves in the past.

Care to share your thought about this video below? I'd LOVE to hear from you.

PS: Is the Party Girls Guide to Peace reaching out for you? The curtains close on January 18. Forever.

In the meantime, right click these freebies (taken straight outta the program) and download 'em to your computer. Free love, baby.

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32 comments

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    • 7 January 2014

      This is a message I've been waiting to learn for a long time. As I get more and more into personal development, this very problem has been arising, and I've been wondering how to find compassion rather than judgement for others who aren't on the same path. Thank you SO much for opening my eyes, Tara!

      • Tara
        7 January 2014

        You're welcome lovely. I'm so glad you're willing to be open to compassion. That's a beautiful thing x

    • Ashlee
      7 January 2014

      Thank you Tara, beautiful xx

    • stephanie
      7 January 2014

      That has really made me look at myself. You've made me do a 360 !

      Great work and expression. x

      • Tara
        8 January 2014

        YAY to 360's! Next up, backflips? ;)

    • 7 January 2014

      Incredible - this video was spot on for me! Also that Chakra healing guide is incredible - thank you for sharing <3

    • Mandi
      7 January 2014

      Wow, I totally feel like this video has come into being at just the right time! I didn't realise that I had been pushing people away until recently and it seems that unconsciously it's a thing. Thank you so much Tara.

    • Sophia
      7 January 2014

      Oh man, you are incredible, Tara.
      You really have a way with words. In 8 short minutes you have just articulated what I have been feeling for the last two years & made sense of so much confusion I've felt.
      Thank you for sharing your pearls of wisdom. x

      • Tara
        8 January 2014

        :) Any day of the week babe. Thanks for being here x

    • 7 January 2014

      Ahhhhhh I get it :)

      • Tara
        8 January 2014

        Light bulb! xx

    • 7 January 2014

      Wooft! Needed to hear this today. After a month back in Scotland with my family, I completely had this experience. 7 years on the other side of the world and 2 babies later, our connection is... different. There was a lot of frustrating ugly judgement from me. I love your perspective. Thank you, lady.

      Vari x

      • Tara
        8 January 2014

        No problemo Vari. Our families are our biggest teachers FOR SURE

    • Vicki
      7 January 2014

      This is so epic! You speak straight to the heart babe xx

      • Tara
        8 January 2014

        Boom! Straight in there :) x

    • Kristen
      7 January 2014

      Great video Tara. You delivered that much needed message lovingly and directly. I hear ya!

      • Tara
        8 January 2014

        Thank you honey .x

    • Sophie
      7 January 2014

      This is a huge wake up call for me. The more positive I become and the more I follow this path, the more frustrated I've become with people who seem to be stagnant and wallowing in unhappiness. I've stupidly even ruined some friendships over it. I got far too caught up in the ego and convinced myself that it was their fault and that I was outgrowing them. It's like you've shone a spotlight on this for me and I am now able to go within and change my egotistical thought patterns.
      Thank you x

      • Tara
        8 January 2014

        :) Be gentle with yourself honey, all this frustration you've been feeling has been perfect. It's allowed you to sit here in THIS moment and reorganise your approach to life. So happy I could help xx

    • Jessie
      7 January 2014

      Thank you Tara! The point you made about "not being lonely but simply tuning into yourself" has given me a new set of eyes to take on 2014 with!! xx

      • Tara
        8 January 2014

        I'm so happy that that line stuck to your babe. It's helped me a lot too xx

    • 7 January 2014

      Hey Tara!!!

      This is the first time I am commenting on any post of yours and first off, I'd like to say a MASSIVE 'Thank you' and 'I ABSOLUTELY ADORE you' :) Each and every one of your posts is sooo inspiring and I really dig your writing. You share such wonderful nuggets of wisdom here, in a completely honest and deeply resonating way. I want to thank you here for the freebies you've gifted to your community. I found them absolutely amazing! esp. the Chakra and Colour Guide. The video is so damn awesome too and I love your perspective on negativity. Thank you so much! You look rockin' in the pink dyed hair ;)

      Much love and light,
      Esha

      • Tara
        8 January 2014

        Holy spicy tomatoes, is there some JOY emanating out of this comment, or WHAT?

        Thank you Esha!

      • 8 January 2014

        Hahahaha! Yup Tara...last night you took up considerable space in my gratitude journal :) There's just sooo much I thank you for every day. I hope the nergy travels through the invisible and lights up your day in some small way :)

        Thank you for everything! :D

    • Allison
      8 January 2014

      Thank you so much for posting the freebes. I absolutely love the Chakra and Color Guide. I was trying to teach my Mom some of these ideas over Christmas and couldn't articulate them quite as well as this simple chart can. I think it'll be really helpful. Thanks again!

      • Tara
        8 January 2014

        You're welcome Alli x

    • Ebony
      8 January 2014

      Tara, your timing in INCREDIBLE! Thank you. My best friend is really struggling right now and I have been judging her the entire way. She shows me how far I have come though, and I have certainly been where she is. Thanks for helping me face this present challenge in my life xxx

      • Tara
        8 January 2014

        Thank YOU for being open :)

    • Bethany
      8 January 2014

      Shit. I am going to come back everyday for a week and watch this. I have been struggling so much with my best mate atm, everything that comes out of her mouth is negative, it seeps into me and I don't want to listen to it, don't want to be around it. But really I think it is because she is hurting, and possibly my own hurt makes me avoid it, I simply can't ask her what is wrong before I've hidden from her negative vibes.
      *Light bulb* haha, I hadn't even thought of that and I just wrote it out, you are a genius Tara!

    • Veronica
      15 January 2014

      Thank you so much for this, came at the perfect moment for me. I am trying to work through the "holier than thou" attitude and understand that I am a teacher and a leaner with all that I come into contact with. Thank you for being so real. x

    • Amelia
      19 April 2014

      Thankyou Tara, so so relevent right now for me. You have such a beautiful soul. I can feel your calm and warmth even from behind the screen. Love you. xx

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