Who am I without this drink in my hand? Who am I beneath this amped-up scene which makes me feel sexy, confident, better? Take away all these late nights, and all this loud music, and… what’s left?
In her debut book, High: A Party Girls’ Guide to Peace, life coach and yoga teacher Tara Bliss reveals the memories of her pained cycle of bingeing and detoxing, and the practices that lifted her up and out; into a life of passion, purpose and peace. High comes to you as your roadmap on how to do the same.
Let this book show you to kick-start an avalanche of self-love, relinquish your FOMO (fear of missing out), transform your relationships, exude sass, confidence and vitality (while sober), and live courageously from the heart.
Your Party Girl identity is holding you back and limiting your brilliance. It’s time to let her go and start living a life of choice, rather than habit. It’s time to release your peace, get high on life and drunk on love.
In the book you’ll find links to
3 BONUS VIDEO WORKSHOPS
TO WHET YOUR APPETITE
1. Curiosity Got You Here, Curiosity Will Get You Out
Let’s make soulful risk-taking your new drug. If you’re willing to ride on into the horizon with the same levels of bursting curiosity that carried you here, the possibilities are limitless. Infinite joy, inspiration, light? You betcha. Saddle up, lady, and bring your greatest gift – your inquisitive spirit – along for the ride.
2. Party Girl, Meet Your Demons
We must identify the memories of our habits and actions that leave us feeling a little uncomfortable, in order to raise the standards of our present moment, and that bright and vibrant future of ours. Such profound and life-changing lessons lie beneath every tear, hangover, break-up, comedown and meltdown from your past. Let’s dissolve those demons.
3. The Candle Burning At Both Ends?
Tell us to quit eating gluten, and we’ll take the bread off our plates. Tell us that Pilates lengthens our legs and tones our asses, and we’ll drag those very asses to the studio. (We may even set our alarm for it.) Tell us to achieve and to please, and we’ll excel in the workplace, regardless of whether we’re fulfilled or not. We will willingly switch from coffee, to green tea, to green juice. We will take pride in our superfood-laden oatmeal recipe. We will dabble in meditation, and renew our gym memberships, and recite the odd positive affirmation. But at the price of the loose, rambunctious girl we become after the clock strikes five on Fridays? Our self-care regime becomes redundant as we flush our cells with a fresh bunch of toxins. We juggle identities in an attempt to have our cake and eat it too. The rules change. I’ve worked so hard. It’s time to let my hair down. I deserve this. It’s time to take an inventory on our current reward system.
4. What’s Love Got To Do With It?
I had begun to hate myself for making that first move on him, that drunken night months earlier. I hated that I’d kickstarted an avalanche of friend-sex and flirtation, which I knew was peppered with a deep, friendship-drenched love for each other. I despised knowing that, if only the two of us could have been friends from the beginning, if I could have maintained a little composure on that first night, then everything would’ve been amazing between us. I’d have had the most caring, beautiful best friend in the world, with whom I could share more openly, and stop playing games. We could’ve been real with each other, present with each other, there for each other. But we were neither here nor there, and the whole thing felt tarnished and soiled.
I don’t care about how much you drink.
I care about how you feel the next day.
5. From Ballistic to Holistic
As I continued to devote to this new way of being, somewhere along the line I noticed that my skin – a previous breeding ground for long-standing and constant acne – started clearing up, that excess weight was melting off me, and my hair and nails had a growth spurt that I’d never before been able to cultivate. I became less reactive, less panicky, less… angry. What had started as simply an endeavour to look bangin’ on my wedding day had quickly transformed into a commitment to a lifestyle that was rewarding me with everything I’d ever wanted: to feel whole, and to feel here. Instead of fear being the driving force behind the desire to look radiant, love was. It’s as though a switch had flipped in my psyche, one that enabled me to remember, “Oh yeah, I have a body. I should, like, probably look after it.” The response from my body was all the proof I needed that I was onto something pretty spectacular.
6. A Clean Slate, A New State Of Being
Some of the most significant friendships we make are either founded in or strengthened by the thirst for partying. Alcohol and drugs enable us to lubricate our inhibitions and sign those social contracts with a fine print that says, “We’re all in this together”. That contract binds us to each other; to relationships that are amplified by pre-drinks and drug peaks; where our collective Fear Of Missing Out means that we throw ourselves into any opportunity to create memories, laugh loudly, tear up the dance floor and maybe – just maybe – pluck Mr Right out from behind the laser beams and gnarly beats. It’s in The Party that we find our wingmen and wingwomen, people with whom we feel safe sharing our hungover pain, lack of responsibility and tales from the trenches. More than anything, we feel we belong; even if our bodies are aching and our heads are pounding. At least we’re not alone…
7. Who Do You Think You Are?
The man I’d met, who was charming and gentle while high, was not the same person while drunk, and I always knew when he had gone too far and lost himself in the drink, because his eyes would turn a steely black; his mood soon to follow.
I grew nervous about this. The first night it happened, I was so shocked and confused and powerless. His softness disappeared right in front of my eyes. He began spitting out words out as though they were bitter in his mouth. His eyes would dart around the room; dissatisfied with anything that they settled upon…
8. Dropping Deeper: Meditation + Soul-Level Living
Our car crept towards him as we came to a red light, and without hesitating another moment, I lowered my electric window. “Are you hungry?” He glances up at me and the blue of his eyes, which burn brighter from the contrast of the dirt on his face, pierce me right through to the soul. “I have some food for you…” He just nods. With both hands, I extend him the trail mix, not breaking eye contact with him once. As the cab starts to pull away, he says, “God bless you”. And I tremble into an awkward cry.
Spiritual practice irons out the creases of separation and helps you to feel the essence of you in every being that you encounter.
9. You Cannot Fail
You’ve just cracked open your eyes. Your head is pounding. Your mouth is dry. Your body is aching all over. And – the icing on the cake – you don’t know the name (let alone recognise the face) of the guy who’s snoring next to you. As you cast your mind back to the night before, you can pinpoint the exact moment that one or two drinks snowballed into an Oh, what the hell! declaration, allowing the wine to flow freely; each sip tarnishing the promises that you had made to yourself just a week before. Promises of mindful drinking, of moderation, they’re pinching at your tender temples now as you lay in bed feeling as though you’ve crashed into a deep pit of despair and failure. But what if it was impossible to fail?
10. Sober Stories To Ignite A Revolution
Dancing at the back of the Boiler Room, listening to Nicky Romano drop ridiculous beats, I turned to Ally and yelled, “Everyone who’s fucked up will be having a really good time right now!” She just laughed, nodded and continued stomping into her dance moves, as if to say, “Hello!? So are we!”
The next morning, as I woke up, I half expected to feel rotten. (I’m going to put that down to habit). When I realised that, actually, I didn’t, holy smokes, it was a realisation worth an hallelujah! For breakfast, Ally and I tucked into leftover kale quinoa and ginger kombucha. Limiting beliefs – quashed. Standards – raised. Liver – humming along quite nicely, thank you very much.
Don’t wish an addiction upon yourself to tell a better story.
Make the change today.
As a former hair-dresser, bungee-jumping teacher and martini shaking bartender, Tara Bliss has always loved one thing: pushing herself and other people to go beyond what they think is appropriate.
These days, as a coach, author and yoga teacher (with swagger), she’s still deeply passionate about guiding women to stretch beyond what is reasonable, or what feels possible.
Named a ‘self-help guru’ by ELLE magazine, her teachings have been featured in Cleo, The Sunday Mail, The Daily Love and Mind Body Green.
When she’s not jamming with her clients or immersed in writing projects, you’ll find her making shapes on her yoga mat, planning a snowboarding trip with her man, hanging by the sea (channeling her inner mermaid), or thinking about Mexican food.