4 February 2019

Episode 1: What Matters To Me In 2019

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Sounds Like Bliss

We all have our own process when a new year is upon us.
Some of us set audacious resolutions that dissolve before the first week wraps.
Some of us go all #nextlevel with our business goals.
Others of us wriggle towards more feeling-state intentions.

As 2018 wound up, I entered into a state of deep reflection for the epic year it was; full of just.so.much. Did all of that heartache and beauty really belong to just 12 short months?!

And I metabolised that, 2019 started to settle into the foreground of my awareness, and I began to sense what would require my attention, intention, affection this year.

Today, I’m lifting the lid on what matters to me in 2019… and the processes and conversations I have with myself that have helped to give me this clarity.

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Thank you for being here today and tuning in, love! If you found value in today's podcast, please subscribe on iTunes and share this episode on your social feed of choice. Instagram is my digital playground, and you can tag me there at @tara_bliss. If you're feeling particularly generous today, leave me a review on iTunes. That will help this sound get into even more eardrums. Thank you so much in advance for that!

Yours in bliss,

Full Transcript

Hey, beautiful humans. Today's episode, Sounds Like Bliss, because we're chatting about what matters to me in 2019. Oh yeah...


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Welcome back my friends. How're you doing? Welcome back. Well, this is officially episode one. Thank you for joining me for the inception and the introduction to this beautiful being that means so much to me. And then is this podcast, Sounds Like Bliss. Oh, it always happens. I've got the energy in my body and I'm always so grateful for this.

So welcome to my sauna. Let me open by saying that. I'm sitting in my sauna right now and no, don't worry, it's not on. No electrical devices will be harmed in the making of this podcast episode. It's at room temperature. I've got some towels down. I'm sitting on the floor facing the back of the sauna and I'm speaking into my mic, looking at my laptop. And this is so nice. I didn't realise this would be like a second bonus to investing in my sauna. Yeah, I thought that would be just for my health and my radiance and a good night's sleep, but, oh, and to help me detoxify from all that flying, of course. But this is a groovy little situation we have here. It's cosy and the sound feels good. And I like how burrowed away I feel. I feel like I'm in a little cave. I have a beautiful fresh cup of cacao right next to me and before I go on, I might just take a quick sip. Excuse me.

Yum, you get to hear all those little drinking noises too. Lucky you. Some people, it really freaks them out, Huh? When they hear drinking, eating, et cetera. I'm not fazed. Hopefully you're not fazed either, because there will be plenty of hot, spicy cocoa being drunk in this cave as I send these missives out to you. So, today I ummed and ahh-ed about whether I wanted this to be a podcast episode. We're talking about what matters to me in 2019. And the reason that I ummed and ahhed is basically because it just sounds like a very self indulgent topic. And then I remember that so many of us enjoy behind-the-scenes insights and we relish in witnessing this process just in case it unearths something about ourselves or in ourselves. Or maybe there will be something here for you today that will just get you thinking a little bit differently about how you approach a year, how you digest the year that was. How you attune to yourself and check in to yourself and the energy of a new year.

I know for me, I always really feel that portal of time as I move into December, where I feel very called to slow down. It often doesn't happen because I'm launching business things around this time. But, energetically, I feel really called to slow down and to check things out, and to attune to myself and my soul, and my relationships, and my businesses and come into some more clarity. Typically, in Decembers of each year, I'm pretty generous with myself with this time. I am in no hurry to bang out goals. I am in no hurry to forget the year that was. I like to be generous with this time of the year, because I have come to understand the potency of reflecting and forecasting and feeling. Feeling the effects. What compounded for me last year that I'm really feeling the effects of now? Whether that's positively or negatively, what is really asking for my attention?

What is asking for expansion? What's really ready just to slip away? Slip away, what needs to be sliced away? There's this process that we all go through, in varying degrees and depths, but I'm really interested in exploring that. What unfolded in ways that were magic or effective, or what simply felt really good this year? And I like to start there. I like to start there. What am I just so proud of myself for? What surprised me? Because, I think often what happens is we can get to the end of the year and we want to address with a fine-tooth comb, what didn't work. We want to get to work on patching that up and creating a plan that can help us avoid that the next time round. But I like to start with, what unfolded in ways that what beauty is and lovely? And that meant a lot to me?

Now, every year this happens, every single year when I get to the end of the year, I say and I think and I feel and I mean, I mean it, when I say, "That was the best year of my life." This includes the year where I was incredibly unwell, and I lost a baby. I spent three months bedbound, debilitated really. It includes the year that that happened. It includes 2018 where I, at 31 years old, became a divorcee. It includes this stuff. And I don't say that to bypass any type of pain. And I don't say that to give myself credit. I get to the end of the year and I look back upon it and I feel, "That was sensational," because it was so full of human emotion and experiences that can't be replicated. And it was full of so many moments that required or demanded me to dig into myself and come up with something of me dripping all over my hands. Whether that was grief or whether it was ecstasy, or whether it was fear, or whether it was delight.

I am so willing, by the way, you might be able to hear some construction in the background there, but we're just going to roll with this. I am so willing to meet life in the middle of whatever is being created or dished up or offered to me. And I think one of the most powerful things that we can cultivate in our life is the emotional resiliency, to open ourselves to the entire spectrum. Truly, it really is, and I will talk about this a lot on this podcast. We really will. I mean, we can talk about anything. We can talk about conflict resolution. Oh, which sounds delightful, I know. We can talk about that moment in time where you decide to open your heart and take in a breath rather than contract. We can talk about that moment in time that can't be described any other way, then this very personal example, and you've heard it here first, I will never go into the details that surrounded this experience, but I remember the moment when I ended my marriage and I ended it with the intention and with the knowing that the most unconditionally loving thing that I could do to honour both of these humans involved and both of these souls, the most loving thing that I could do for the good of all, and not just the two of us, but the planet, was to let the love go. So, I feel like when we have this emotional resiliency, when we ... dissecting pain in a different way, when we are looking at love as not something that is just attached or entwined with intimacy or physical attachment or hooky love or needy love, or "I don't know who my identity is if I don't have you" love.

But when we can expand that conversation out and see the true gifts, that pain and despair and loneliness have to offer us. And if we get it, if we understand that, this is necessary and this is what I asked for, because I asked for an exceptional life, and if I am living in mediocrity, then all this bullshit will be torn out of my hands, because it's what I asked for. Then you can meet life, in a way, where you can come away from anything. And on December 31, you can say, "That was a sensational year." So, if I'm just riffing off the top of my head, if I think about what really worked well for me in 2018, there are a few things. I honoured my soul, which was whispering to me for a long, long time. I did the courageous thing, and on a few occasions, I answered her.

Even when I was afraid, or even when I was scared. I found my joy again. I actually know what it is like to embody the vibration of play. I giggled so much this year. I don't even know what happened to me. I was just frothing my face off. There was about three or four months straight there where I just could not stop laughing. And I actually think that that was very inextricably linked to sexual energy, which we might talk about at some point in the podcast. But I beamed this year, I spent a lot of time with people who brought out the best in me and the most in me, and I really prioritised those folks. I deepened my relationship energetically with my businesses. I called in and bought a beautiful home that truly is a home. That has just been such a gift. I took a lot of time out to honour what I needed, which was just simply time with myself.

And I activated my inner rebellion in such a way that changed a lot of how I digest relationship dynamics. I came to really understand the meaning of boundaries and the importance of them and I feel as though I exercised them in a very compassionate self-loving, respectful way to the world. I genuinely, in 2018, just stopped really caring about what people were thinking of me and the way that I do things. And I stopped genuinely caring about what other people were doing and the pace in which they were going. I came into myself in a way that's difficult to explain. Oh, it was a big one. It was a big one and it was a beauty. And so, after I get clear on what worked really well, then this is a time I'm very eager to dive into what didn't work so well. I know that deep change doesn't just require fluffy words on mediocre intention.

A lot of deep change requires attention and planning and stillness and compassion with the self, strategy sometimes as well as just a heartfelt desire to transform. And so, it was Christmas Day and in 2018 I decided to spend Christmas family free, which again, was another thing for me to celebrate me being in my sovereignty, me being really connected to what I felt I needed after a really big year. Like I said, businesses launched and a marriage separation, as well as cultivating these new relationships. I did not want to be in the chaos, let's say, of a big family Christmas. But the nostalgia of that time of year, it hit me really hard and I was on the phone to my mom and then all of a sudden I started to see very clearly, right out in front of me, all the ways in which I realised I was not showing up.

And the ways in which I was not showing up was particularly evident in my closest community. And I felt this really deeply with my mom. And I remember saying to her, "I think that we can do better." And we were both in tears and it really moved me and it really brought into my mind that, "Yeah, I'm that gal that when things get really tough and when things are chaotic and when I feel the juggle come on, I can turn towards my work before I turn to the ones I love the most." This is something that I feel is top-of-mind for me in 2019 as I move forward. I didn't set any big goals last year. I certainly created a lot, but my main goal was to be in my life and to find my joy again. And I did but to find that joy, I needed to do the hottest thing I'd ever done.

I simply wanted to launch Rebels of Light into the world and remain receptive to any opportunity that arose. And I did that for the first, like I said before, for first six months of the year, I just felt this electricity in my cells. And whilst that was absolutely incredible, it was also very, very, very distracting. I've got to tell you, I found it really difficult last year to sit and produce or to sit and receive because I was just after that hardship of the first half of the year, I was just peeking. I was constantly peeking. I realised I had work to do in my relationships. I realised that I had work to do on entering into a state of work that means something to me, that I can be proud of, that I can be really happy with. So this year, what I am desiring and what matters to me, right up the top of that list, is to have a sovereign relationship with time and technology.

I am rewriting my relationship with these two entities, with time and with technology. I am so tired, on behalf of us all, with how addicted we are to our devices. I'm so sad for us all. It is getting in the way of heartfelt connection, soul-driven creation. There's few things I disliked more than getting to the end of the day and thinking to myself, "What the bloody hell happened? Really? Was I just consumed by my day? What happened to time? Where was I? Where was I situated today? What did I allow to gobble me up?" Notice not, "What gobbled me up?" But what did I allow myself to be gobbled up by? So transforming these relationships with time and technology is really important to me. And its rituals that are going to help that unravel really beautifully.

So it's coming into a really gorgeous, stunning sequence of practises in the morning, which help me to expend time, which inform me to connect with me first before anyone else's agenda. It's structuring my schedule, again and again, this is something that I revisit every two or three months. And I know it sounds like vanilla and boring and bland and whatever you want to call it. But to me, this is the foundation of freedom is, how am I participating with time and technology? Because time and technology are partners and they are energetic allies of ours, they really are. But the balance of power there has been knocked out, and it's time that we claim our power back over these things. What does my schedule look like, and how does it support my expansive state of creation? How does it support my ever growing intuition? Am I really that much more interested in what may have dropped into my inbox than I am on what's trying to drop into my heart in this moment?

So join me, my friends. Join me in this. I want to design a life that supports epic romance with my muse, and I'm not just talking, I want to feel inspired. I want to feel impassioned by this process of creation, and it's coming back and I feel it. There's no other way. Sometimes it just feels like life is making love to you, when you see the creative process this way. I've experienced it and I continue to, and I am committed to cultivating that relationship with inspiration. It's important to me to deepen my connection to my soul and this earth that we live on and my businesses. There are people in this world who are so close to me that remind me of this constantly. [Hiro Boga 00:21:20], I'm thinking of you. Vanessa Jim, I'm thinking of you. McKinsey, I'm thinking of you. And it just brings tears into my eyes knowing that we have this opportunity to collaborate energetically with these allies in this way.

Our work is more than a to-do list. We are in sacred collaboration here. If we would just slow the fuck down and tune into that. If we would just create the space in our life where we can enter into reciprocity, and then we can be in awe at the process like wide-eyed little children. That is what matters to me, this year. I've got this in bold, but ensuring that the people that I hold dear know that they matter to me. My friends, my next tattoo is going to say, "Love is a verb," and it's a reminder for me to not just be love and to not just hold the vibration of love. Even though that may be enough, it is to put that love into action. It is to spend time with the people I love, and is to express to them that I love them, and is to call them, and is to gift them.

I'm doing a personal little project this year called the "You Matter To Me" project. Feel free to implement that. That project takes up a one or two-hour slot in my calendar every week and that's where I sit down, I have a look at, whose birthdays coming up? Who on my team do I need to acknowledge, who on my team do I need to gift? How are my parents doing, how's my team doing? And it's just an opportunity for me to drop into someone's life and remind them, "Hey, I see you and I love you and I'm still here." One too many times this last year I had people try and get in touch with me and say, "Hey, I know you're busy, but just in case you have two minutes, I would love to chat with you about something." And that hurt my heart a little bit, to think that I had set up those relationships in that way.

What matters to me this year is thriving whilst travelling. I'm getting better at this, but I am certainly, I've got a long way to go. I travel so much. I think I have an international flight booked well at plans for every month of 2019. And so, it's really important to me that I, again, embrace preparedness and honour this body that is being hurtled through space. Whose nervous system is being put under stress through travel and events and crowds and sort of being knocked out of that routine. But I am committed to doing all those things. I am committed to living a life of travel, because I know that that's what my soul wants. I know that my soul signed up for that. She's a seeker. She wants to get her hand in all different kinds of sands. Coloured sands, textured sands, she wants to dive into oceans and climb mountains and get the red over her.

And I'm committed to doing that. I'm committed to being present in the events that I need to be at, so that I can bring information home to help other people thrive, so that they can have the same freedom that I have. I am committed to figuring this thing out, thriving whilst travelling. And I promise to share more about this with you as I go. I want to leave room for life's little pleasures and I really mean life's little pleasures. I feel so blessed for this robust lifestyle of exploration and adventure that I have. Like I just mentioned, I travel a lot. I see a lot of different countries and landscapes. So, for me, when I'm at home, it is the little pleasures. It's time for writing poetry, time for cooking meals with friends, time for reading books, real books. Not iBooks and not audio books, but reading real books and skateboarding in the afternoon and making love in the morning. And that's what I want to leave room for.

All of this requires me to embrace a new and different scaffolding in my life. It requires me to posture myself. And this brings us back to the first point. This requires me to have a sovereign relationship with time and technology, because if I don't, all of those beautiful things that I just mentioned are at risk of not being breathed into, or not breathing life into me. It all comes down to time, technology, my relationship to those things. And, am I making my connection to my heart, my being, my soul, my creation more important than those things? As it comes to the end of 2019, there is a little intention that I am setting for myself and my team. And it comes back to the generosity that I like to offer myself at that time of year. I really want to have December off. I want to have the most of the month of December off to potently close off the year and attune to the coming one.

And I know that that sounds crazy, but hey, look, I reckon that if I can give one month of my time and my attention to celebrating and forecasting the previous 11 months and the next 11 months, I think that's a pretty good return on investment. So that month would include, reflecting and celebrating, releasing that which we know has become heavy for us or non-serving. It requires scripting future memories. I'm really big on scripting, my sis, Peta Kelly, told me all about this. I will share with you scripts that I have written at some point in the future. And I say "future memories." That's the term that I give it. I don't talk about "visualisation," I talk about future memories. They're memories that are out there. You need to start remembering them now, so that when you're in that moment of creation, and when you're in that moment of receiving them, they feel familiar to you and they remind you that you've created them.

December would involve cleaning up and decluttering everything. And I mean, everything. Every single little corner of everything, every folder on my computer, every corner in my cupboard, every item of clothing. Everything. It would include attuning to my soul and the experiences and wild adventures she wants to have, attuning to my business and what's coming through. And that will inform me on whether I need to adjust any of my values or my rituals or my practises. It would include consciously gifting, which is something that up until now I haven't really been into, but this year I'm changing my tune on this. I've always been of the tune of, "Don't gift things, just gift time." But I want to play with what it would feel like to tune into someone I love and offer them a gift, a conscious gift that they could enjoy and cherish.

It would include spending grounded and present time with people I cherish, being largely offline and off social. And all of this will ensure that I can enter the new year feeling the full effects of that portal. I don't know if you've ever experienced this, but suddenly it's January one and January three and then January seven and, whoa, we're into it. Again, particularly those of you who have a doTerra business, where it's a month-by-month cycle. It's crazy. For me, I think, watch this space. I'm planning to have a really beautiful, nourishing December, which will create beauty in 2020. We're getting to the end of this episode now, but I'll finish off here by saying, there are some feelings and mantras or words that I have anchored into that will be my little compasses in 2019. And some of them you would have heard. My girl, Ange Peters, has a beautiful programme called, well, it's called The Beautiful Life Lab.

I really suggest you check it out if what I'm saying to you today around organisation and basically sovereignty, when it comes to time and technology and creative process. It's a really great programme that you can run through. She teaches you how to basically claim your agency over these things, so that you're back in a state of deep work and deep flow, rather than constantly being haunted by your own distraction. Ang introduced me to this beautiful word, "Eudaemonia." And I've googled it and I've researched it and it can mean any number of things. It can mean "the state of deep presence and flow when you are doing work that you love." I've seen it been defined as "#lit" or "human flourishing." And so, I have brought all of those little examples into my mind and jumbled them up and to me, eudaemonia, that state of being in non-distracted fully-devoted creative flow, where there is nowhere else to be, and nothing to do, and no app to open, and no email to read. And there is nothing to do but to be in the miracle of the collaboration that is the creative process. Eudaemonia.

The next word is, "Hygge." I hope that I'm pronouncing that correctly. Recently learned about this awesome word, H-Y-G-G-E. It is a Danish and Norwegian way of life, hygge. To me, it's another word for "cosy." And I've seen it being described as "creating intimate moments" or "a hot cup of cocoa by the fire." And really it is a way of being in which your life feels lush, generous, where your environment feels beauteous. And you can achieve that through the way that you relate, the way that you decorate your home, the way you cook or present a meal, the textures that you put on your skin, the fabric that you put on your skin. It could be an essential oil that you inhale. It's multi-sensory to me. Hygge reminds me that even though I live on the Gold Coast, Australia, to live a cosy life. Cosy, as a feeling in my body, that's what I'm committed to. Number three is to explore the edges now. Explore the edges In 2019. In 2018, I got in the arena and I did some hard stuff and I spent a good chunk of that in survival.

And this year, I'm like, "I want to explore the edges." How deep and how high can I take my Rebels of Light when we launch? How many people can we free financially through the business model of doTerra? How much can I get into this body? How sensual can this body become? How intimate can my relationship with my soul be? What is possible? What is possible this year? What is possible now that I am in thriving? Now that that survival mode is, for the most part, a speck in my rear view mirror? What is possible now? Number four, rise in love, rising love. My beautiful friend Vanessa reminds me that it is not falling in love. It is rising in love. And I'm not going to say too much on that topic other than that I am committed to with courage, rising in love, rising in devotion, rising in union.

So remember my friends, it is not the year that defines you. It is you that defines the year, and to be in a sovereign relationship with time, is to know that we can be in right relationship with our life, the seasons, the cycles of our lives. You decide what matters to you. Your hands are dripping with the you that you decide. What are you pulling up out of yourself this year? What are you offering up to the world? Show us. Show us. That sounds like bliss to me.

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    • CAndice hooper
      8 February 2019

      So inspiring. Thankyou. I love listening to the words you use to describe things.. I have a thing for delicious words and your podcast is full of them. Thankyou for shining your light down through our team... I am greatful.

      • tarabliss
        11 February 2019

        Thank you sweet woman! Such a pleasure to share in this with you

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