Why do you love him? (Or her!) I want to hear the unexpected, totally-took-you-by-surprise reasons. Right here.
To kick off a little Valentines Day hoo-raa, I’m going to suggest that we all take a moment or two and get really, really honest with ourselves about a few things.
Before I came over to Japan, I read Wabi Sabi Love, by Arielle Ford – a simple but powerful read; one in which she gives umpteen examples of how to find perfect love in imperfect relationships.
In one story in particular, she describes how utterly frustrated Wife becomes with Husband, who has a penchant for morning poppy seed bagels. Husband just can’t seem to manage taking off for work each day without leaving a trail of black seeds all over Wife’s clean tiled kitchen floor.
It’s enough to make Wife’s blood boil.
Until one day, this jolting question appears in her psyche: If I look down one morning and those poppy seeds aren’t there, what does that mean?
The answer? It means… he’s gone.
If that stone cold realisation isn’t enough to make Wife worship those very seeds that lay sprinkled atop her tiles, I’m not quite sure what is.
And – moral of the story – it got me thinking about what we perceive to be imperfections in our partners are in fact their greatest gifts to us. For real.
Click play and you’ll hear a little about how this applies to me and Glen, and in particular, what it was like to collaborate with him in creating Such Different Eats.
And, because celebratory lists tell the world that we’re wide awake, noticing and grateful for the bounty of love in our lives, let me just declare, right here, a little more left-of-the-middle love for this man who coasts through Life at a gear I can only marvel at.
- He has the patience to learn and experiment with the manual settings on our DSLR camera. I mean bloody hell, I can’t even seem to get ‘Auto’ to function right.
- He’s the one who invests his time into researching all our travel. He makes the bookings, scouts the best places to stay, organises shuttles… If I’m not working, I can barely stand the sight of my computer, let alone book holidays on it. Often, when I finish a day’s work, I have vulnerable moments that show up in my life as an expectation that Glen will drop everything and offer all of himself to my thoughts and words and musings. I can tell you honestly that as I sit right here, typing from our hotel room in Hakuba, that I am incredibly grateful that he retreats to his Holiday Construction Cave, just as I retreat to my Creative One.
- He stares blankly at me when I talk too much, which I’ve learnt to digest as my clue to plonk myself back in the present, instead of trying to compensate for something by filling up silence with unnecessary noise.
- He reminds me to let my hair down on occasion. To share a bottle of sake with him. To try new foods. To sleep in. To progress my snowboarding practice (he’s like totally my shred mentor! Ha).
- When he’s feeling restless, he simply reaches for book; a planet of pages that he could lose himself in for hours. Every time my eyes land on him when he’s curled up reading, I’m reminded of the permission I can grant myself to do the same.
- We spend the afternoon vision boarding. His core desires? Happiness. Excitement. Contentment. Boom, simple as that. He prints out pictures of snow and surf – that’s his idea of Enough.
Under different circumstances, any of these situations might drive me a little bonkernoodles, in fact, I’ll be straight with you here, in the past – in the archives of our lives together – they absolutely have. But you know what? As a seeker (and let’s not forget, as the companion of this man), it’s my responsibility to perceive his light. To allow whatever egoic echoes that ache to cause friction between us to fizzle (the fuck) out.
I’ll amen to that.
So, like I mentioned in the video, WHO are you celebrating the sacred masculine in (bearing in mind it very well might be a woman), and give me 2 unexpected reasons why. Dig deeply, Such Different Babes.
Looking forward to pouring through your words. All comments and shares smiled at with love.
Happy Valentines Day.
PS: Have you grabbed your copy of Such Different Eats yet? I’m proud as punch of it.